Where There Is A Will, There Is A Motherf*cking Way
There is something just so badass about being a mom, wouldn't you agree? I mean, we are CONSTANTLY dealing with problems that need immediate solving and we're always learning new management, leadership and problem-solving skills through the roller coaster ride that is parenting. There is something so unique and awesome about the struggle of motherhood that makes a woman a flat out badass when she becomes a mom. I always knew us moms had an inner badass, but I confirmed it about a week ago at my son's 5th birthday party when everything that could have possibly gone wrong, did.
Despite all the obstacles and setbacks that life hurled at us in a 48-hour period, my husband and I were still able to pull off a pretty successful party for our little man and the very obvious lesson I learned through all of it was this: Where there is a will, there is a motherf*cking way ladies.
The wonderful thing about running a business while raising a baby is that the lessons you learn in both areas of your life apply to either area. After going through the hellish experience I went through to pull off Liam's birthday party, I learned that as long as I am willing to do whatever the hell it takes to achieve my desired outcome, I will be successful. Period.
Whether I am planning a birthday party or trying to take my business to the next level, as long as I have the will, I will find the way.
December 1st (48 hours before the party)
It all started with our basement flooding 2 days before the party. Mind you, our party was IN our basement and we were expecting about 70 people. And you know, the flooding alone was pretty bad, but you know what was even worse? The smell. Our entire basement and most of our house smelled like a school of fish had been swimming in a sewer, flopped all over our house and died in our basement. Somehow, the pipe that connects to our washing machine and drains out the dirty water got disconnected and after I ran a load of laundry, the dirty water from the laundry spilled out all over our basement floor along with this thick, nasty black muck that had built up in our pipes (and was probably the reason the damn thing clogged and got disconnected in the first place.) The day our basement flooded our problems had just begun. That day, I woke up feeling pretty sick, slow and feverish. I hadn't gotten sick in months, probably in well over a year actually, and two days before the party when I needed to be busy hustling and doing stuff, I got sick. All I wanted to do was sleep and drink tea, but I had to keep moving. I called a plumber and they said they couldn't be out to see us until the following day. Later that evening when my husband got home, he cleaned up the water and the nasty black muck with a dry vac and actually ended up breaking the vac because it got clogged with so much liquid and muck. We opened up windows and poured baking soda all over the floor to help absorb the thick smell but it was still there.
December 2nd (24 hours before the party)
On December 2nd my day started off in court. It was 8am and I was sitting in a large, cramped court room with a bored 5 year old who wanted to download and play dozens of games on my phone while I managed his runny nose, my runny nose and a raging fever. It was a special kind of mom hell that day. We ended up spending 3 hours in court that morning to pay a citation I got from getting into a car accident a month prior. I paid my $200 citation and left that court room with my dignity and germs splattered all over the seats. I kept pressing forward. There was too much to do and we had already wasted 3 hours of our day in court. As soon as we got home, I made Liam some lunch because he was starving and when I started washing some dishes to make his lunch, I noticed that god-awful stench again. I ignored it and continued to wash our dishes and scrape our soggy, soapy day- old food off our plates and throw it down the garbage disposal. But the smell just kept getting worse and worse and I couldn't ignore it anymore. I ran down to our basement and almost cried. Our basement was flooded. AGAIN. But this time it flooded from the dirty sink water from the dishes I had just washed. Oh and wait, it gets better. All that soggy food I had just shot down the garbage disposal? It was all over our basement floor, too. The same pipe that shoots out the dirty water from our washing machine is also the same pipe that shoots out the dirty water from our sink and for some reason, it conveniently got disconnected again. I totally lost my shit. I called Jeff (who was still at work) and told him he needed to leave work ASAP because I couldn't tackle my ever growing to-do list on my own anymore. Then, to make matters even worse, the plumber I had called the day before was a no-call no-show. The plumber was supposed to arrive at noon to fix our pipes and never did. I called a different company and they said the earliest they could have a plumber come out was 6:30pm. After getting off work, my husband had to swing by Home Depot to buy another dry vac to suck up the mess yet again. The plumber finally showed up in the evening, stayed a couple hours, fixed our pipes and charged us $400 bucks for it. Between the court fees, the extra dry vac from Home Depot and our plumbing bill we ended up spending an extra $700 we were NOT planning on spending (hence why you should ALWAYS have an emergency fund). Which we do not have. Obviously.
By Friday evening I was feeling so sick my husband asked me if we should cancel the party. I said hell no because the show had to go on. We had worked too hard for too long to just quit at the very end. We went to bed that night at 2am feeling exhausted, broke and very sick. Here is a picture of my husband at around 1:30am completely passed out in my son's tent castle. #Parenting
December 3rd (the day of the party)
The next morning I woke up at 8am only to find that the balloon stand we had worked on for 4 hours the night before had fallen down (along with the nice colorful drapes).
We spent an extra 40 minutes re-building the damn balloon stand and putting it all back together. As soon as we were done I got myself and Liam ready and left the house as fast as I could to pick up cupcakes, coffee, breakfast burritos, champagne and O.J.
I had the crazy, crazy idea of hosting a birthday breakfast at 10am for 70 people. Let's just say, this was the first and last year of birthday breakfasts. As I was pulling up our driveway with 70 breakfast burritos in my trunk I called Jeff and asked him to come out and help me carry the burritos inside. He answered his phone and said,
Jeff: "Nope, can't help you right now."
Me: "What? Why?"
Jeff: "Our ceiling is leaking."
Me: "You have to be f*cking kidding me."
Jeff: "Nope I'm not. Gotta go."
I grabbed half of the burritos from our trunk stormed into our house and sure enough, there was Jeff standing on a chair trying to fix the leak in our roof. There was a big metal pot on the floor catching the dripping water and our guests were standing there in a circle witnessing the whole thing. Never in the 4 years that we've lived at our house, has the ceiling EVER leaked. EVER. The ceiling just happened to leak the same year, the same month, the same day and the same HOUR that we decided to host 70 people at our home for our son's birthday party.
It was one of those moments where you look up to the sky with your arms stretched out and ask, "Why? Why do you hate me so?" I walked into our kitchen with 35 burritos, a fake smile and a lump in my throat. I wanted to cry and laugh and scream and greet our guests and help my husband but all I could do was stand there frozen and totally shocked. We had gone through so much bullshit to pull this party off and the obstacles just kept on coming. It was as if God was bored that day and was like, "Let's see how much more they can take before they break."
Long story short...
We didn't break.
We kept going because that's what we do.
It's all we've ever done. It's all we know how to do.
We keep going and going and going because forward is how we move. So that's what we did.
We moved forward.
Jeff fixed the leak in our ceiling, I hosted as best I could despite how shaken, exhausted and sick I was, and we had a pretty fantastic party considering the small hell we had to go through to get there. Our first guest showed up at 10am and our last guest left at 8:30pm and we partied all the way through till the end.
I wanted to share this story with you because our experience although shitty, taught us a profound lesson: As long as we never quit, we'll always win. And you know what mama? I am positive you've gone through your "special kind of hell" days as well and have questioned your sanity, your God and your competence. But remember this: Any obstacle we face and conquer in our mom life will only add an extra layer of armor and confidence to our business life. The better you become at not quitting, the better you will become at winning. In ALL areas of your life.
So next time your biz problems get tough and you feel like throwing in the towel, tap into that reservoir of strength that lives deep within you. Trust me, it's there. Every mom has it. Every time you deal with broken bones, bad manners, picky eaters or crazy birthday parties you're adding more layers to your armor and more strength to your reservoir.
Tap into your strength mama.
Don't waste it.
Use it and grow your business with it.
God knows my reservoir is overflowing after THIS party.
Besos Bella Mama